Kayla's favorite toy,,,,our cat Rocky

Doesn't he just look thrilled!

After a long hiatus

Sooo, its been awhile since last posting! Since 2007, here are the updates:

-Our daughter Kayla is now 5 years old and in kindergarden!
-We are Engaged! Wedding this October!
-I graduated college w/ BA degree in Criminal Justice in 2008 (complete waste of time)
-Due to awesome economy, couldn't find a job in my field
-Back in school now for nursing (gotta go where the jobs are!)
-Still waiting for this horrible economy to get better (I think this will still be awhile)

Some Advise From Things I've Learned the Hard Way

Im not blonde but many people say i should be...


1. When making a cheese steak, dont put the cheese on the frozen steak or you'll get white mush

2. Dont look at your feet while walking, or you could walk into a full length mirror-embarrassing

3. Cereal goes in before the milk

4. Dont teach a friend how to drive a stick in your own car, i didnt know it was physically possible to shift from 5th gear to reverse while doing 45mph...my poor camaro made a noise like it was crying

5. Birth control pill + Antibiotics + Sex = baby Kayla

6. While driving and smoking a cigarette, make sure the window is down so you dont smash it into the window and cause a bonfire in your back seat

7. While riding in the passenger seat and smoking, make sure cigarette does not fly back in after you throw it out, or it could find its way down the back of your pants...bad day

8. Birthday party: 2 bottles of mikes hard lemonade + 2 tacos + hot shower = blaaaaah all over the shower floor

9. New Years Eve: White wine + Red wine = same result as above plus a pounding headache

10. If you dont know what it is, dont eat it

Top Ten Most Annoying and Creepy Kids Shows

Since my daughter loves TV, you would think I would be used to these annoying shows by now, but I don't see how that is humanly possible, if anything, they just take away a portion of my sanity each time i watch them. I most likely have not watched every kids/toddlers show out there, but from what i have seen, here's the list

10. Dora the Explorer-Summary: small hispanic girl and her pal Boots (a monkey) have a mission. shes not that bad, I just hate when they figure out their mission and have to repeat it over and over..."Through the swamp, over the hill, and past the lake!" she must say it at least 8 times and everything she says ends in an exclamation! Also, I want her get a GPS for christmas, that way maybe it won't direct her through the swamps, caves, and jungles. But that is doubtful because if her parents cared about her enough to get her a GPS, they wouldn't let her wander off like that in the first place and just drive her to where she needs to go. If I was her parent, i'd get rid of that monkey, he always looks evil and seems like he wants Dora out of the picture.

9. Hip Hop Harry-Summary: Big guy in bear suit complete with a sideways hat, baggy jeans and huge bling around his neck raps with kids. I don't know if everyone gets the channel this is on, but if you do, you need to watch it at least once. I guess i find it more funny and entertaining than annoying. I'm not sure exactly what the concept of the show is, but i guess it's trying to reach out to the next generation of rap artists.

8. Teletubbies-This one doesn't need a summary, because if you've never heard of this show, you've been living under a rock and aren't entitled to read this list. Everything in this show is so off the wall, I have to wonder if the people who created this show were just sitting around one day eating acid laced donuts and hash brownies and decided on a great new idea for a kids show. And something about the Teletubby custard part creeps me out. Also, i feel bad for the baby trapped in the sun, although he always seems happy.

7. Blues Clues-Summary: crazy guy lives in a world that looks like it was drawn with markers. Hes the only real person in the show, everything else is cartoonish. We only watch the episodes with Steve. Kayla doesn't like the ones with the new guy Joe...shes very picky for her age i think. Either way they're both annoying. The only other part with real people is when he gets mail and does the wiggle his ass dance. But i hate how every letter is from "our friends", just once i'd like to see him get a letter from "our enemies" and then inside instead of it being a bunch of kids, its a bunch of teletubbies. Of course this would suit my entertainment purposes rather than hers.

6. Thomas and Friends-Summary: trains with faces. Not only do they have faces, but the faces they make creep the hell outta me. I remember when i was a kid and thinking they were evil. Thats the only real reason this show is on this list. To me, anything that shouldn't have a face, but does, can be classified as creepy.

5. Barney-Summary: Same rule for the Teletubbies applies hear. Everyone knows Barney. I can't stand this show. His goofy laugh. the over-acting of the kids. The gooey mushiness of every episode. I hated this show when i was forced to watch it when i was younger because my little sister loved him. Now, its hell all over again. Barney is Kayla's ultimate favorite show in the whole world. Grrrrrr! I have already decided i don't want anymore kids, one is just fine. Barney being one of the reasons behind that decision, i don't think i could take this a third time. Also i was never really sure if Barney was supposed to be real or a hallucination, if its the second one then this show should be closer to #1 on this list.

4. Boo Bah-Summary: very colorful alien hedgehogs squeeze themselves to make strange noises while setting your kids up for a future of therapy. I've never actually sat through an entire episode of this. There didn't appear to be any actual language being spoken. They just make weird noises and make their heads go in and out of their necks like turtles. They're beyond creepy. Warning-this show may imbed itself in your unconsciousness and cause severe nightmares.

3. Mr. Rodgers-Summary: old guy wears sweaters his mom made for him, his only friend is the mailman, and visits a land of hand puppets. This is #3 because it has one of my biggest fears in it-puppets. Some people are afraid of spiders, the dark, clowns..etc. I am terrified of puppets. I don't know what it is about them, but everytime i see one i want to hide under my covers. This was especially bad when i was a kid and watched Fragle Rock. I don't know if any of you remember that show but there was this one mean puppet thing that lived in a dungeon and tried to eat the Fragles that ran through his backyard. I think that may have been when my fear developed.

2. Caillou-Summary: the everyday life of 4 year old boy named Caillou. First of all where did that name come from? For some reason i think it sounds like it may be canadian or from alaska. But anyway, in every episode all you hear is his extremely annoying whiny voice. This is another one of Kayla's favorite shows. It's on PBS. I never even heard of this show until a year ago. Can anyone please tell me why this kid is bald? His 2 year old sister Rosie has a full head of hair. He is constantly complaining about something in every episode. Also, i feel bad for him because he is always 4, and in a few episodes he is upset because he wants to start school and his mom tells him he has to wait until he's 5. But that birthday never comes. So he's doomed to sit at the window and watch his older friend Sarah get on the school bus everyday. The only thing that is really annoying about this show is his voice, but trust me that's enough to put this show at #2 on this list.

1. Sesame Street-Summary: I'm sure everyone knows sesame street. I know what you're all thinking-why is it #1? Aside from the fact that my fear of puppets holds especially true for muppets as well, its the Elmo part that i'm focusing on. Kayla loves elmo, so we have to watch that part. It's called Elmo's World. Elmo talks to his goldfish friend Dorothy. Then asks a question like 'how do you play a game' or some other 'how to' question. Then comes the creepy part; he opens up his blinds and standing there is this perverted looking 40 something year old man named 'Mr. Noodle', he has curly hair, baggy pants and a mustache. He doesn't say anything and wanders around acting stupid. If he could talk, I could picture him saying something along the lines of "Hey there Billy, why don't you come over here and look at my trouser snake." He is the creepiest looking guy i think i have ever seen. and he is on a kids show. He would be much more suited for a show that teaches kids to stay away from strangers. He could be that bad creepy guy in the car offering the kids candy. You really have to watch it to know what i'm talking about.

mr. noodle

If you think i missed something let me know, these are just the ones off the top of my head that i've seen.

Seymour had dinner

So, my very cute daughter did something so cute the other day. She threw up in my mom's (her mum mum) face. Ok, maybe it wasn't so much cute, as it was hilarious, not for my mom though. Kayla was just sitting there innocently, then she let out this burp that you'd expect to hear from a 300 pound drunk guy. So of course her mum mum was concerned and picked her up, and while she was saying "hunny are you alr...." it came out. It all came out. Everything she had eaten for probably the past 3 days. It was a flood pouring out that seemed never ending. Kayla takes after me, because she was laughing too. So my mom's face, as well as the kitchen floor was covered in this wretched smelling brown goo. Kayla ran off to go continue to watch her Barney, my mom went to wash her face, and Seymour ,our beagle, ate all of the goo on the floor and left it sparkling clean. That's one advantage to having him around, he's better than the Roomba.

What's Wrong With Me?

While i have many answers to go with the question above, this one focuses on attraction. No i'm not looking for a guy, me and Todd have been together for over 4 years and we have a wonderful 18 mo. daughter. However, i'd like to think i still "got it", ya know, everyone likes the compliment of being asked out every once in awhile, even if you know you're gonna say no. I'd like to think of myself as a decent looking person-5'1, 105 lbs, and no odd features. I used to get asked out all the time, but lately my fan club has been downgraded.



In the last 5 monthes, i've only been asked out by 3 people. First there was the Jamaican wannabe white guy with dread locks who was only about an inch taller than me. Then there was the 52 year old cuban guy who didn't speak much English and was covered in fake diamonds and drove a limo. Finally there's my favorite-the 19 year old pizza delivery girl who asked me if i was a lesbian, when i replied no, she said, 'why not, you should be'.....OK, because I'M the odd one. However, i tried to be nice and didn't get smart with her because she really looked like she could kick my ass and then eat me.

Stupid People Like to Buy Cars

i work at a car dealership, i answer every phone call that comes into the dealership- i always wonder the same thing when i'm sitting here answering the calls...are there really this many stupid people in the world? Because if these people are a sample of the rest of the world, the future doesn't look too good. Here are a few examples of the people who call here:

"I wanna speak to the person in the commercial"-no i'm not joking

"I wanna know What's the catch"-hmm, let me think, even if i could tell you, do you really think i would...do you really think you'll get an honest answer?

"How many credits do i need to get me a car?"-not that this statement is even worthy of a response, but i like to say "i think you need about 10", i figure if they ask "how many credits.." they probably couldn't buy a pack of gum with their credit score, let alone a car.

And then I get a lot of callers and people coming in to the dealership asking to speak to a sales manager, thinking they're Mr. Bigshot and they're gonna get a better deal-people, this does not work, it just makes you look like an idiot because they're not gonna sell you a car and not make money off of you. If you don't buy the car for their price, someone else will. Plus the managers will just laugh at you when you walk out. It's a cruel business.